


The Hack

by Holde_Maid



Category: Highlander (Movies), Highlander: The Series
Genre: Gen, Mild Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-10-17 19:44:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10600920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holde_Maid/pseuds/Holde_Maid
Summary: Methos initiates a hacking job





	

**Author's Note:**

> Not my series, not my character, not my products - no copyright infringements intended, no money made. 
> 
> As for the rating, how do you rate something for the mention of a vibrator? I honestly don't know.

"How long've you been part of the community?" asked _whippersnapper701_ in an unusual display of proper grammar.

Mistrust. That was what essentially the question was about. Hackers wore it like a name badge, for it was essential to their doings. Therefore Methos was careful to evade, "Ever since I was old enough to code," while mentally calculating back and concluding it was too long to seem believable. Okay, next time he could just truthfully say "37 years" and add a laughing smiley.  
"Unless you mean this place in particular," he continued, referring to this super secret forum that lived on server space and bandwidth pinched off of a multinational corporation. It was here that Methos came every so often to brush up his knowledge of code words, techie abbreviations, geek speak, tricks of the trade etc. Every six years he changed his avatar and user name - currently _OldYoungster-_-_. And every so often he went out of his way to actually be of service to the community so he'd stay in the good book of these people. All in all this required little work, and it furnished him with an indispensible resource.

He was spared further questioning by the board founder _phoenix007_ , who intervened, "Cut the crap, noob. -_-'s been here forever." Out-paranoia-ing an Immortal of his age was quite a feat, but she had done it, teaching him to word everything gender neutrally. "So what's this gig about?" she followed up.

Methos had issued a veiled invitation to a high-end competition. In the semi-coded language they used, he retorted, "The AooI's wifi. "AooI" was short for "Apple of our Eye" and referred to the president.

 _phoenix007_ 's response read, "gsp" - meaning "Gasp!" - and "wtf".  
  
"And big brother and the wife's vibrator," Methos now typed with a mischievous grin on his face.  
  
_candybum_ commented "gigglesnort  gotta bring in chemtrails. MUST be part ofit."

Seven others lol-ed or rofl-ed, and _phoenix007_ asked, "Where's the conspiracy in that?"  
  
Just in case, they were pretending to be a forum of conspiracy theorists, your average bunch of harmless nutcases and had a suitable slant in their list of code words:  
  
big brother = sound recording devices (bugs, audio recorders, sound rippers, Alexa, that new game console, etc.)  
(while "Big Brother" had its traditional meaning - capitals always told you to take the word literally)  
chemtrails = cameras (and most recently, video ripper programs)  
big foot = linux  
smart = outdated  
alien = well-defended  
yeti = new, as yet unbeaten defense programs  
conspiracy = (hacker) activism  
...  
  
The list was endless. _phoenix007_ kept reminding everyone to keep it as a physical handwritten list, never on their comp.  
And equally often she kept reminding everyone that the forum was about activism, not just fun projects. Hence her question.  
  
"Conditioning @007", he answered.  
  
_Se1der0se_ asked, "As in hair products?" and reaped in a "lmao" from _candybum_.  
  
"Letem explain," _phoenix007_ demanded. Methos shuddered at the unsightly contraction. Oh well, he'd just have to ignore how language was violated all the time in chats. As usual.  
  
"I happen to know it's one of like those vibrators remote-controlled via wifi. So... Every time a certain word is spoken, the vibrator activates for a bit. Like 'peace'. How's that?"  
  
"Evaluative conditioning," _3docdocdoc_ labled the idea. "Not exactly subtle."  
  
"I'll dig into it," _candybum_ declared. A few others me-too-ed.  
  
The project was under way. It was nothing much, but it had entertainment value and thus bought him a place in the heart of several community members. Later he'd reveal there would actually be a prize for the winner of the contest - codes that he had simply paid for - and cement their liking for him. Yes, life was good. Nothing was more useful than knowing hackers who could pull that sort of thing off.


End file.
